How does God give spiritual gifts? Will God give me the gifts I ask for?

from the old testament

• Although not specifically referring to spiritual gifts, when God called the prophet Jeremiah to serve Him, He said, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations" (Jeremiah 1:5). Though this passage was written specifically to Jeremiah, it reveals that God prepares us before we were born to serve Him in a particular way (see Psalm 139 and Ephesians 2:10).

from the new testament

• The Holy Spirit gives every believer at least one spiritual gift (1 Corinthians 12:7-11).
• God is the source of all spiritual gifts. First Corinthians 12:6-7 tells us, "there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone.”
• Spiritual gifts are given to reflect God’s character and to be used for the good of others. They are not about personal gain but about serving others and strengthening the body of Christ: “To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good" (1 Corinthians 12:7).
• Ephesians 4:11-13 confirms that gifts are given to equip believers for ministry and to build up the body of Christ.
• A believer may have more than one spiritual gift, but no believer has every gift (1 Corinthians 12:8-11).
• The Holy Spirit distributes gifts individually as He wills (1 Corinthians 12:11), and He gives gifts as He sees fit for the good of the whole (1 Corinthians 12:18).
• In 1 Corinthians 12:31, Paul writes, "But earnestly desire the higher gifts." This likely refers to gifts that are most beneficial for building up the church, such as prophecy or teaching (1 Corinthians 14:1-3). It does not refer to desiring gifts with the intent to promote oneself or to gain importance.
• While some spiritual gifts are more visible than others, such as teaching, prophecy, or miracles, all the gifts are important and play a vital part in the body of Christ. Instead of desiring certain gifts that we do not have, we should seek to use these gifts to glorify God and for the good of others, serving with love. First Corinthians 12 concludes by Paul noting, "And I will show you a still more excellent way" followed by a chapter on love in 1 Corinthians 13. Love is the foundation that gives purpose and significance to the use of our spiritual gifts, ensuring that they glorify God and edify others (1 Corinthians 13:1-3).
• First Corinthians 14 discusses two gifts– prophecy and speaking in tongues (or languages)– that are important because of their ability to reach unbelievers and to help believers grow. At the same time, Paul writes that "all things should be done decently and in order" (1 Corinthians 14:40). All gifts, including the more visible ones, should be done out of love, for the good of others, and decently and in order.

implications for today

We are called to grow in love and to serve according to God’s will with the abilities He has given us. We shouldn’t compare our gifts or abilities with others’ because God has given each gift for a specific purpose. Comparing ourselves to others can lead to envy, pride, or discouragement, which distracts us from the calling God has placed on our lives. Instead, we are called to recognize that every gift, no matter how visible or behind-the-scenes it may seem, plays a vital role in God's kingdom. Our focus should be on using the abilities He has given us to serve faithfully and bring glory to Him and to edifying others, especially in the body of Christ. As we recognize our own unique spiritual gift, we can trust Him for its use and outcome (1 Corinthians 12:14-27).